People always appreciate it when you put a little humor out into the world, so we have gathered all the best funny letter board quotes for you to share. And if you’re looking for short letter board sayings, we also have you covered.
Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.
Funny Letter Board Quotes and Sayings
Friends are the family you choose.
They say don’t try this at home…so I went to my friend’s home!
“Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.” — Philander Johnson
Hating me doesn’t make you pretty.
The best days are Beach days
Every day is a new day. It does not matter what happened yesterday. And you know why? Because you cannot change it anyways.
You’re just like bacon, beer, and chocolate – you make everything better.
I’m a smart person, I just do stupid things.
If you set impossible goals you’ll never be disappointed when you fail.
I’m really good at stuff until somebody watches me do that stuff.
Your secrets are safe with me… I wasn’t even listening.
If I was to be controlled, I would have come with a remote.
A selfie a day keeps the doctor away.
“I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.” — Steven Wright
I don’t always surf the internet, but when I do, eyebrows
Weekend, please don’t leave me.
If I send you my ugly selfies, our friendship is real.
How do I feel when there is no coffee? Depresso
As your best friend, I’ll always pick you up when you fall, after I finish laughing.
Best friends don’t care if your house is clean. They care if you have wine.
“I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.” — Arthur C. Clarke
“Nothing is impossible; the word itself says “I’m possible.” — Audrey Hepburn
“I would have written a shorter letter, but I did not have the time.” — Mark Twain
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch … I call it lunch.
People who say they’ll give 110% don’t understand how percentages work.
It’s funny how sometimes the people you’d take a bullet for are the ones behind the trigger.
The World is yours.
Good thing I brought my library card because I’m totally checking you out.
Where are the average things manufactured? The satisfactory.
I am not taking a selfie, I am just checking my camera quality.
Every day I fall in love with you more and more. Except for yesterday… yesterday you were pretty annoying.
Let’s commit the perfect crime. I’ll steal your heart and you’ll steal mine.
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” — Charles Schulz
Friday … Our second-favorite F word.
I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.
“I am only human, although I regret it.” — Mark Twain
Yes, of course, I am athletic… I surf the Internet every day.
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that people who have the most live the longest.
Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.
“An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” — Agatha Christie
Brains are awesome. I wish everybody would have one!
“Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. Then by all means follow that path.” — Ellen DeGeneres
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.
“Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.” — Steven Wright
If being Hot is a Crime ARREST ME!
The first five days after the weekend are always the toughest.
“If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?” — Abraham Lincoln
If there would be an award for being lazy, I would send someone to pick it up for me.
“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.” — Jack Handey
Don’t apologize for honest mistakes that were a result of taking a chance.
“Nobody goes there anymore because it’s too crowded.” — Yogi Berra
Burn for what you love.
I am a ninja. No, you are not. Did you see me do that? Do what? Exactly.
Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they will start using it.
After gossiping about me, please pray for me. I want to be perfect just like you.
Never let your best friends get lonely… keep disturbing them.
If you fall, I will be there. Signed, Floor.
50 Shades of dark circles under my eyes.
“And remember, no matter where you go, there you are.” — Confucius
“Life is too short to be reading quotes about life being too short. Stop reading and go live your life!” — Kevin Ngo
It’s okay even the sky cries sometimes
Normal? Normal is only the people you do not know well enough.
Fresher than you.
When nothing goes right, go left instead!
After Tuesdays, even the calendar goes WTF.
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” — A. A. Milne
Make it a December to Remember
Wine is always the answer. What was the question again?
The best thing to do first thing in the morning is to go right back to sleep.
Don’t trust everything you see. Even salt looks like sugar.
Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.
Vodka may not be the answer, but it’s worth a shot.
We’ve been friends for so long I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence.
Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can’t beat surfing the net.
I don’t believe myself when I say I’ll be ready in five minutes.
Please don’t download my Selfie, you may fall in love with me.
I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.
I used to have superpowers but the psychiatrist took them away.
That awkward moment when you’re wearing Nike’s and you can’t do it.
According to my mirror I am pregnant. The father is Nutella.
Too bad you can’t take selfies of your character.
Sweater Weather is Better Together
Eat like no one is going to see you naked.
I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.
When nothing is going right, go left.
Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity!
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.
You add meaning to my life and yet, you subtract some cash from my wallet.
Finding friends with the same mental disorder. Priceless!!
I put the “Pro” in procrastination.
A good mood is like a balloon: one prick is all it takes to ruin it.
There is no lousy weather, only lousy choice of clothing.
I am standing outside. Therefore, if anyone asks, I am outstanding!
Never let anyone treat you like regular glue. You are glitter glue.
Smile… it confuses people.
It’s never too early to go back to bed.
Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.
“The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.” — Zach Galifianakis
Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it!
“Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” — Dale Carnegie
Best memories come from bad ideas
You never run out of things that can go wrong.
Don’t you wish they made a clap-on-clap-off device for some people’s mouths?
It’s hard to find a friend who’s cute, loving, generous, caring, and smart. My advice to y’all is, don’t lose me.
Doesn’t expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected?
For me, math class is like watching a foreign movie without subtitles.
I love you so much I’d fight a bear for you. Well, not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu. But a carebear, I’d definitely fight a carebear for you.
What do you call a person who is happy on Monday? – Retired
“Dental-Chair Revelation: Once you have your mouth open, dentists lose the ability to ask questions with a simple yes or no answer.”
The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.
I have no selfie control.
There’s snow place like home
I’m in desperate need of a 6-month vacation…twice a year
I’m a big fan of whiteboards. I find them quite re-markable.
A selfie once a day keeps the depression away
I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.
“Every time something pops in my head, I think twice about it and I do it anyway.” — Gilbert Gottfried
You make my heart skip a beat
Be the EXTRA in extraordinary.
I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.
How do you call a pig that does karate? Pork Chop
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It’s very time-consuming.
I had fun once, it was horrible.
Friends come and go like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay, like an octopus on your face!
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food.
Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.
“I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.” — H. Kyle Seale
I know that looks aren’t everything, but I have them just in case.
Friends are like rainbows, always there to cheer you up after a storm.
He stole my heart so I’m planning revenge… I am going to take his last name.
Monday hates you too.
I don’t always make sense, but when I do, I don’t.
Whenever I have a problem, I sing. Then I realize my voice is worse than my problem.
“A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.” — Don Marquis
The smell of the ocean never gets old
Cooler than the other side of your pillow
“I’m not for everyone. I’m barely for me.” — Marc Maron
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying!
My excuse is that I’m young.
Fear is only temporary. Regrets last forever.
“It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance.” — Thomas Sowell
“If you come to a fork in the road, take it.” — Yogi Berra
“Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” — Forrest Gump
The road to success is always under construction.
I invented a new word: Plagiarism.
Stupidity knows no boundaries, but it knows a lot of people.
I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom-highlights.
I’m on a seafood diet. When I see food, I eat it.
I’d take a nerf bullet for you.
“Made with love,” means I licked the spoon and kept using it.
Sunshine mixed with a little hurricane.
The best is yet to come.
“It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious.” — Bill Hicks
Put in work. Believe in it.
They say crime doesn’t pay. So does my current job make me a criminal?
Some of my best friends are carbs.
We don’t know what’s tighter: Our jeans or our company culture.
I love you with all my belly. I would say heart, but my belly is bigger.
Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
Who needs self-awareness when I can make you aware of me instead?
Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow.
“I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.” — Seasick Steve
I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
I think we’ll be friends forever because we’re too lazy to find new friends.
Have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can’t find them.
I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
Me doing me.
When a girl is in love, you can see it in her smile. When a guy is in love, you can see it in his eyes.
Give me the chocolate and nobody gets hurt.
Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute. Yet…I wouldn’t call them lies!
I’m on a date, she isn’t very social.
I am so tired of love songs. Oh, awesome, Ed Sheeran is on…
Good friends show their love in times of trouble, not just in times of happiness.
Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents’ job.
My bed is a magical place I suddenly remember everything I had to do.
Genius is in knowing what to hold on and when to let go.
Whoever invented knock-knock jokes should get a “No Bell” prize.
“If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” — Steven Wright
Confidence level: Kanye West.
You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.
“People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.”— Isaac Asimov
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I’m with you!
Good Vibes happen on Tides
Reality called, so I hung up.
The hardest thing being single is finding a reason to shower.
You rock my Christmas socks
“Time to witness the handsome!” — Lancelot (Mobile Legends)
Alcohol! Because no great story started with someone eating a salad.
I always thought perfect couples only exist in books and movies. That changed when I met you.
I know you are a sensitive person but no worry I am Sensodyne to your sensitivity.
I may be down to earth but I’m still above you.
I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.
Side by side or miles apart real friends are always close to the heart.
Life is not about how hard you can hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.
If there’s a will, there’s a wave
Boys/ Girls are like parking spaces. All the good ones are taken.
“To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.” — Ashleigh Brilliant
Did I make your heart skip a bit?
My hairstyle is called “I Tried”.
Some things look very good in dreams
Confidence Level: Selfie with no filter.
No one will ever be there in “two minutes”
You never know what you have until you have cleaned your house.
I’m not crazy I prefer the term mentally hilarious.
“Genius is 1 percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration.” — Thomas Edison
I haven’t posted a selfie in a while but I still am very cute just to keep you updated.
I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin ME.
Don’t worry if plan A fails. There are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
“To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.” — Paul R. Ehrlich
I like sarcasm. It is like punching people in the face. With Words!
I was going to make myself a belt made out of watches, but then I realized it would be a waist of time.
Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
I took 37 of this pic before I finally got it right.
Reality called, so I hung up.
My mother told me not to talk to strangers. I never talk to myself anymore.
Any of us has the capacity to light up a room. Some when they enter, others when they leave it.
Google earth view gives you an amazing chance to see amazing places all over the world, from the comfort of your own home. With this amazing privilege, what do most people look at? Their own house, their friend’s houses, and most places they have already been to!
Practice makes perfect but then nobody is perfect so what’s the point of practicing?
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” — Steve Martin
“It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
A cop pulled me over and told me Papers, so I said Scissors, I win! And drove off.
Hold on, let me overthink about it.
Friends are therapists you can drink with.
You don’t have to be crazy to be my friend. I’ll train you.
“I didn’t give you the finger, you earned it.” — BIll Murray
The only scenario where you really need a landline today is when you’re trying to find your cell phone.
“I intend to live forever. So far, so good.” — Steven Wright
Be strong, I whispered to my WiFi signal.
My favorite subject in school was recess.
But first, let me take an elfie
I am trying not to think about you but it’s not working.
I would like to apologize to anyone whom I haven’t offended yet. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly.
I look at people sometimes and think ….. Really?? That’s the sperm that won.
“When all else fails, there’s always delusion.” — Conan O’Brien
Sure, I do marathons. On Netflix.
“The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.” — Robert Bloch
I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s 7 years in a row now.
If you never go, you will never know.
I need some beach therapy
“A painting is worth a thousand confused art-gallery visitors.” — Ljupka Cvetanova
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
By the way, I’m wearing the smile you gave me.
So that is it for our list of Funny Letter Board Quotes and Sayings. We hope you found the perfect one for you!
For more great ideas, check out our other lists of Funny Work Sayings, Funny Summer Sayings and Short Summer Letter Board Quotes.
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About the Author
Laynni Deir
I am Laynni Deir, writer and editor of Purely Lists. There are times when you are looking for inspiration or aren’t sure what to say and I am committed to providing lists of the best quotes, sayings, messages, puns or captions for any occasion. Whether you are looking for a positive quote, a message for a card, a fun saying for a letter board or caption for your next post or story, you will find the perfect option here.
The goal of Purely Lists is to provide a comprehensive and diverse set of lists to cover every situation from holidays and celebrations to uplifting quotes and general motivation. Whether you are looking for something deep and profound, funny and foolish or positive and encouraging, we strive to offer easy, fast and accessible options.