Man’s best friend is an important part of your family, which is why we have put together a list of all the best cute and funny dog captions for Instagram for you to share. And if you’re looking for short dog quotes for captions, we also have you covered.
Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.
Funny and Short Dog Captions for Instagram
“The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.” — Andy Rooney
Treats incoming in 5. 4. 3. 2…
“I don’t think twice about picking up my dog’s poop, but if another dog’s poop is next to it, I think, ‘Eww, dog poop!” – Jonah Goldberg
These Paws are on Patrol!
They patented it, packaged it, slapped it on a plastic lunchbox and now I’m smelling it. I wanna smell it!
I need to start charging this dork rent.
If my dog were a Transformer, his name would be Begatron.
Are you barkin’ at me?
Not now, my dogs are killin’ me.
We are very loved.
I find your lack of treats disturbing.
The pupper is pooped.
“A dog desires affection more than its dinner. Well – almost.” -Charlotte Gray
She’s just so fluffy!
Did the cat put you up to this?
Ready, set, fetch!
“If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.” – Fran Lebowitz
When you fall asleep watching TV with your bff.
Happiness is belly rubs.
Say hello to our new baby!
This isn’t all it’s barked up to be.
This bark’s got some bite.
Oh sure it’s seven years of bad luck for you, but it’s 49 for me!
All we need now is a stick to chase.
Look at those big old clumsy paws!
Butt pats!
I have no idea what you’re talking about, I’ve been sleeping all day.
There will be no shredding of the furniture while I’m gone.
Check out this little jellybean.
“A boy can learn a lot from a dog — obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. ” – Robert Benchley
If anyone asks, we were out taking walkies.
Nap time.
Where would I be without my little furry buddy?
He thinks he’s people!
No, these are the real Pet Shop Boys.
I’m going to name my next dog Phideux.
1 like = I will boop the snoot.
“Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul, chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!” – Anne Tyler
The more people I meet, the more I love my dog.
The Call of the Not So Wild.
Presenting, Mad Max: Furry Road.
They’re just all paws.
It’s all fun and games until the humans come home.
It’s always ‘Who’s a good boy?’ and not ‘How’s a good boy?’
3, 2, 1, sneeze!
If I ever have to choose between you and my dog, I hope you’ve finished packing.
You can tell your dogs are thirsty when they form a line for the toilet.
Caught you red-pawed!
Show me the yummy!
Sometimes when I’m upset, my dog brings me toys.
I have so many pictures of this sweetheart.
There’s no such thing as too many kisses from your dog.
Jokes on all of you — I get to snuggle with her whenever I want!
If our dog doesn’t like you, we probably won’t either.
PUPPYYYYYY! Puppypuppypuppypuppy!
Eat, Spay, Love.
This is what makes my world go ‘round.
She always knows exactly when I need to pet a dog.
Here’s a quick (and adorable) timeline cleanse.
I think somebody’s about to do a backflip off the couch.
I am going to give you so many head pats.
Where does he get those wonderful squeaky toys?
“My cats inspire me daily. They inspire me to get a dog!” -Greg Curtis
We’re having a different kind of Dog Day Afternoon.
Dogs are my favorite people.
If you’re uncomfortable around my dog, I’m happy to lock you in the other room when you come over.
“I once decided not to date a guy because he wasn’t excited to meet my dog. I mean, this was like not wanting to meet my mother.” —Bonnie Schacter
Can’t decide if I should scritch the ears or the chin first.
Elementary, my dear Weimaraner.
Cuteness overload!
Without my dog my wallet would be full, my house would be clean but my heart would be empty.
Paper shopping bags make great hats.
My tail is crafty, but I’ll catch up to it one day.
Completely passed out. Such a Snoozin’ Sarandon.
Worth it!
Paint me like one of your French poodles.
There’s no crying in fetch!
Check out my new haircut!
Leave me alone – I’m only speaking to dogs today.
Can’t wait to introduce you to your new forever home.
We’re gonna need a bigger food bowl.
You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.
Ooh-wee-hoo, I look just like Buddy Collie.
Not me barking at nothing at 4 a.m. and then trying to eat toilet paper.
“If I could be half the person my dog is, I’d be twice the human I am.”—Charles Yu
Forget barefoot, I wanna go dogfoot.
The only person who understands me is my dog.
Little man had a big day.
What else can be said except ‘Awwwwwww!’
It’s four blocks to the park, we’ve got our leash, half a bag of treats, it’s mid-afternoon … and I found my sunglasses. Hit it.
“Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.”—Roger Caras
I hate it when you make me beg.
If you want the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog.
Don’t tell mom I ate half of her purse. And don’t ask which half.
My dog loves to read Clive Barker.
Why don’t they ever hold still?
We’re having a bad fur day.
Your little code won’t be so handy once I learn how to spell!
I would move the stars to keep you in my life forever.
When are cats ever this sweet?
Looks like somebody is happy I’m home.
“You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘Wow, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!’” – Dave Barry
Dogs. Just … dogs.
My dog keeps me on a short leash.
We brought you home and my heart has been full ever since.
This home is filled with love and dog hair.
I wish I could focus on anything as hard as my dog focuses on Snausages.
10 out of 10 on Yelp.
“‘Meow’ means ‘woof’ in cat.”—George Carlin
Nailed it on the first try.
“Did you know that there are over three hundred words for love in canine?”—Gabrielle Zevin
Glamor shot!
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?
Just look at that little nose.
No home decor is complete without dog hair.
I make this look good.
Can you dig it??
Something doesn’t smell right …
If your dog is fat, you aren’t getting enough exercise.
Our newest addition has a bit of a hair problem.
Pardon me while I put my face on your face.
“My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.” — Joe Weinstein
I am one dog short of crazy.
“A well trained dog will make no attempt to share your lunch. He will just make you feel so guilty that you cannot enjoy it.” – Helen Thomson
My world begins and ends with a cold, wet nose.
You want the boop? You can’t handle the boop!
I don’t who care who dies in the movie, as long as the dog lives.
What I like most about people is their dogs.
Go ahead, make me play.
Bring me my kibble!
We’re walkin’ here!
I wish they could stay like this forever, but housebroken.
Long hair don’t care.
Believe it or not, this isn’t a painting.
Beware! Dog can’t hold its licker.
Caught in an awkward moment.
You had me at ‘Who’s a good girl?’
Enjoy sleeping on my pillow while you can, because in a few more years you won’t fit.
Choosing a dog may be the only chance you get to pick a relative.
Just once I wish someone would put food in front of you and tell you to ‘Leave it.’
I see a lot of house training in my future.
Puppies. They make everything better.
“Dogs teach us a very important lesson in life: The mailman is not to be trusted” – Sian Ford
My furry son in the sun.
“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.”—Groucho Marx
Those eyes just scream ‘Feed me now!’
Nothing in the world is friendlier than a wet dog.
I’d adopt them all if I could.
My little paper shredder.
Life without a dog is like an unsharpened pencil. It has no point.
“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot little puppies.”—Gene Hill
They’re so excited for food I can hear the theme from Paws.
The best therapist has fur and four legs.
Looks like someone can’t want to meet the rest of the family!
I’m not a bad dog, I’m just drawn that way.
Every snack you make, every meal you bake, every bite you take…I’ll be watching you.
What a little floof.
Less people, more dogs.
I think someone’s been tempted by the Bark Side of the Force.
When I die my dog gets everything.
Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies.
Look at this angel. ‘All Dogs Go to Heaven’ indeed.
We never were in Kansas, silly.
Somebody blinked.
Of course I want to go outside, why do you keep asking?
I whip my tail back and forth, I whip my tail back and forth.
No Timmys. No wells. Just vibes.
Quick! Grab the Frisbee!
I came here to chew bubblegum and chase squirrels. And I’m all out of bubble gum.
Dogs are like potato chips. You can’t have just one.
So that is it for our list of Dog Captions and Quotes. We hope you found the perfect one for you!
For more great ideas, check out our other lists of Summer Sayings, Horse Captions, Walking Captions and Getaway Captions.
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About the Author
Laynni Deir
I am Laynni Deir, writer and editor of Purely Lists. There are times when you are looking for inspiration or aren’t sure what to say and I am committed to providing lists of the best quotes, sayings, messages, puns or captions for any occasion. Whether you are looking for a positive quote, a message for a card, a fun saying for a letter board or caption for your next post or story, you will find the perfect option here.
The goal of Purely Lists is to provide a comprehensive and diverse set of lists to cover every situation from holidays and celebrations to uplifting quotes and general motivation. Whether you are looking for something deep and profound, funny and foolish or positive and encouraging, we strive to offer easy, fast and accessible options.